Tuesday, August 29, 2006

Lost Souls

Earlier today, as I'm driving down Beverly Blvd and stop at a redlight - on the corner, directly beside me is a cozy little coffee house. There is, what looks like, a fairly large blood stain on the sidewalk - right beside a plastic milkcrate with a few filthy items inside, and a dirty shirt or small jacket bunched up beside it. My heart beat faster - I admit that I panicked at the thought of what might have befallen that person. My eyes filled with tears - of anger, and sadness. What happened? Where is the owner of this stuff? Is he, or she, one of the millions of those who are forgotten - as if they never walked the earth - never breathed the same air as us - never mattered? What brought them to this point? I wondered what it would be like to walk a mile in their shoes....
- - - - - - - - - - - - - -

It's cold out here in the dark
Voices all around me,
in my head, in the air.
I can't think clearly - is this real?

I need a drink,
to make the voices stop;
to get some sleep.

This looks like a good place to rest;
among the scraps of other people's lives,
the hard cement under me,
no blanket, no pillow - no safety.

Will I die tonight?
Will a pack of ignorant teens
with a wad of money in their pocket
and cruising in "Daddy's car" find their entertainment in beating me?

Will I die tonight?
Will the temperature drop so low
that my heart slows
and I can no longer move?

Will I die tonight?
Will my spirit break beyond repair
so I lack the courage
to face another empty day?

Will I die tonight....
and will anyone remember me?

I was once an athlete,
a scholar,
an honor graduate.

I was once a friend,
a lover,
a child.

I had a future.
I had dreams.
I had love
- but it is all lost now.

Now I have conversations
with myself,
and people cross the street
to avoid me.

Now I smell of urine
and filth;
I cannot control
the simplest functions.

Now I am alone.
Now I am forgotten.
To you I do not matter.

Do not think ill of me,
this is not who I chose to be;
this is not how I saw my life;
this is not my heart.

Please look beyond the surface;
see ME,
not this haggard body and mind.
Don't let me fade to nothing.

Please remember me.....

(For Reed - I love you, brother! I thank God that you have an amazing family that cares for you, so you will never be "forgotten".)

1 Comments:

Blogger Virg. said...

Thanks, Kitty! This came totally from the heart - someone very close to us (Reed) is bi-polar and has schizophrenia. Through the efforts of his parents, a lot has been done on behalf of services for the mentally ill, and I have learned so much about these disorders. Knowing what I do now, it is impossible for me to turn a blind eye when I see a homeless person - if anything, it makes me want to make a greater effort to help!

7:21 AM  

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